Steven's First Father's Day

Some people say that a woman becomes a mother whenever she gets pregnant and a man becomes a father whenever he first meets his child.

This may be true for some men... but not Steven. He's been a father from the start. He's had to make the same tough decisions that I have, which has required him to think and act like a father already. He would constantly say.. "We need to do what's best for him.. he's my son."

Words can't even describe the amount of love I feel coming from Steven to Noah already. I couldn't have asked for a better person to be sharing this with. He may seem tough.. but he's really just a big old softy.

I'll never forget the first time we heard Noah's heart beat. I looked over at Steven and he was smiling so big. Almost tearing up. It was such a wonderful feeling to know that he was in awe of this just like I was. During our first ultrasound he held my hand the whole time and squeezed it and smiled when we first saw Noah. He loves taking me shopping for maternity clothes and always wants to help and put in his two-cents. On his day off he bought me a maternity body pillow to help me sleep and suprised me with it when I came home from work. Almost every night he rubs my back and hips because he knows that they hurt throughout the day. While I'm getting ready it's so amazing to look over at him and see him staring at me. I know he loves my growing body and appreciates every milestone. He even tried to lie about seeing my first stretch mark. Haha.

I was thinking about it the other day... and looking back at my old boyfriends I'm not sure many of them would have stayed with me if we were to be having a child with Noah's diagnosis. It really takes a good hearted man to be willing to love a child with a disability no matter what. Steven never saw it as that big of a bump in the road. He saw it as we created Noah and we will love him no matter what.

Throughout everything Steven was one of the only people who could calm me down. When my Mother and I sat and talked and got all worked up about how sad his life would be and everything he'd miss out on.. Steven would text me the perfect thing. He told us to stop being silly women and relax. Noah would experience just as much joy and happiness as any other child. It all depends on how we raise him... and we haven't yet. So why worry? We knew he was right. Steven was right all along.

I've never felt so loved by a man in my life. My grandpa's come in a close second. But Steven really genuinely and unconditionally loves me. I can't wait for Noah to feel all the love Steven is going to show him. Because I already know how amazing it is.

I am so proud to say that Steven is the father of my child and I thank god that he gave me a strong man to stand by my side through all of this.